I shouldn't be blogging. Not when I have a 20% Comparative Crim assignment due in.. six hours' time and I am not even half done. Geez. But you see, I haven't exactly woken up from my summer dream yet. Yes, that's what I call it. A summer dream. The rational me knows for a fact that dwelling on past memories is never a good sign. You get stuck when the whole world moves on and when you finally decide to move on, you realise that it's too late. Not that it's impossible, but now it takes a greater effort. And humans, for most of the part, prefer the easier way out. But alas, the human heart is not meant to work this way. As much as I try not to, I find myself lusting after the life I had in the States. It was easy, it was fun. It was after all summer.

There were no readings to be completed. I woke up, I made breakfast. I go to work (and have fun 'cos I enjoy work), I hang out w my dear friends or those at Marthas. I watched a bit of teevee, I laughed a lot. Hugs were aplenty and so was sleep. I got paid every week and I din have to bother whether I would have enough to spend. I love travelling, I love work. Life was.. easy.

Of course, rationally speaking, it would suck if life just went on that way. What would happen to me in the future? What kind of satisfaction would I be able to reap from a job that repeats itself everyday. Having too much of sth usually makes me sick. For most of the time. The fickle human does sicken me at times. But I have learnt to accept it. For what better specimen of that is there when I see one everytime I pass by a mirror.

And so I hold onto these memories. And am unwilling to let go of them. Just yet. But I will. For after all, what can be more senseless than refusing to let go of sth that you can never truly own. It was not yours to begin w. Be glad you even had a chance to experience it. Grateful? Resentful? I can't tell, they prolly go well tog. In a wrong way.

And so I proceed to move on.

Back to my half-baked essay. Yes, divine intervention would do me some good now. Preferably in the form of a 1,200-word essay.

____

Good bye, Summer.
It was a pleasure meeting you.